It’s amazing what happens when a dateless wonder such as myself gets a boyfriend. It’s as if the heavens have rent and Jesus Christ himself has parted the sky. Friends and family react with awe, wonder, then scream and run for cover… you know, stuff like that.
“Friends” who have ignored my emails or rejected my initiations to get together for lunch, dinner, whatever, somehow heard it through the grapevine (or my blast emails, who knows) that I’m seeing someone, and all of a sudden, they want to meet him. Since I wrote these people off my list after their second or third brush off, they’ll either meet him by accident, or when hell freezes over—whichever comes first.
Friends who have been around, but have been sucked into that black hole called “marriage, kids and family,” suddenly emerge again and want to invite us over for dinner, or get together for a double date! Go figure.
All kidding aside, this new relationship is quite an adventure. I’ve spent close to 20 years being with no one, and now I’m suddenly a part of someone’s life, and that someone is a part of mine. And my friends and family think he’s the second coming—or at least a close equivalent.
So for those who didn’t read my intro blog, let me officially introduce this Wonder of My World.
His name is Lynn, and we have been dating for 10 months now… Ten months—that’s longer than some of my living situations! We met through a dating service called Together. After years of trying the online thing, I was inspired by my friend, Chandra Years, who signed up with a service called Just Lunch, and six months later, was engaged. If someone as classy as Chandra could do it, then so could I!
Yes, I’m not ashamed to say I paid money for the experience, and No, he’s never worked for Chippendales. He’s been a telecommunications and field engineer for most of his working life, and before that, he was in high school.
We first met in August 2005, two days after my birthday, but had started talking before then. The way Together works is you go to a four-hour interview and a matchmaker takes your stats: when you were born, what your goals are in life, whether you’ve done drugs or murdered anyone, the usual questions. Then they take your information and do a match with another member’s information, comparing your preferences, likes and dislikes. When they find a close match, they call you and give you a brief 411 on this match, and ask if you’d like to be sent an invitation. You have the option of declining, or accepting, depending on the type of service you chose. My service included six matches, so I couldn’t be too picky. Lynn was my first match, so I said yes, was sent a profile in the mail with his contact information (they are very old school), and we took it from there.
I first contacted him on the phone, but he was away in San Luis Obispo for the weekend with his family. He said he would phone me when he arrived back in Los Angeles, but I didn’t hear from him. Chalking it up to a typical male, I expected that I’d never hear from him, and decided to wait for the next introduction match up. Lo and behold, later that week, my niece Gabi said he had called, but didn’t want to leave a message, stating he’d try to catch me later that day. I couldn’t wait for later in the day, so I called him. We chatted briefly, and arranged to speak that night. An appointment he kept… and we’ve been keeping them ever since.
After 20 plus years of perpetual singles groups and non-dating experiences, i.e., the whole Christian “date in groups” thing, I simply made a choice between two evils: be the old lady with the two dogs (I don’t do cats—allergic), or get myself out of the usual environment and risk more rejection. Since I haven’t been able to acquire the dogs yet, I decided the second option was the best bet.
I had no expectations of a permanent relationship through the experience. I feel like I wasted a multitude of energy toward finding The One, and decided to open up to someone with whom I was compatible and wanted to spend some quality time. Funny, he turned out to be The One after all.
The relationship is still new, so you’ll be hearing more, As The Girl Turns…